Books are sacred. I get it. But some books on your shelf might be holding energy you didn't even realize you were living with. Here are the questions I ask — practical, honest, and energetic — to decide which books deserve a place in my home.
Just the other day I reorganized my office and my books. I found 4 books I decided to let go of.
At first, I thought well, they are books, how can I let them go? But, why keep them around if I'm not going to read them, so I'm donating them. There are a few more I could let go of but I'm not quite ready to part with them yet! LOL 😊
That's awesome! And it's a process :) I find that I circle around my belongings several times - each time having greater clarity on whether I want to keep something or let it go.
Something I find very cool is that when I've cleared out my inner clutter over time and on a consistent basis, I'll wake up one day and I'm at a new level in my energy and without planning it, I feel the need to declutter something that catches my attention. Recently it happened for me with my office without any pre-ideas of doing it. When I uplevel my vibration, I end up decluttering a room, or a drawer etc. 😆✨️
100%!!!! That is the work :) When we uplevel, it's important to uplevel our space to match our new vibration. Otherwise, the old energy in our space drags our vibration back down. And yes...so very often, we do this work intuitively. The curious thing would be to look at what have you cleared internally - and then what were you drawn to clear in your space. Often, there's alignment in those two things.
Hmmm, interesting question Dorena! I felt drawn to re-organize and clear my office. There is still more to do in there but I cleared off my desk and re-arranged some of the furniture - it feels so much “lighter” now and more spacious (like my inner world) ✨ I also de-cluttered one kitchen drawer! LOL. So, I’ll have to think about your quesition a little more as to how it relates to what I’ve cleared energetically from my field…. thank you! 🙏
It's always super fascinating when those two worlds collide - the inner and the outer. I'd be curious if anything you've cleared related to showing up in your work differently. Perhaps being more readily seen.
Thank you so much for this. I'll have to print it and have a LONG moment with this. I currently have around 30 books stored in my father's house in Brazil. He is coming to Europe next month and should bring them to me. He sent me a picture of all of them, to make sure I still want them all. I find it so hard to let go, these 30 books are already the 3rd triage I made of all the books I left when I moved abroad (there were almost 200 + a lot I inherited after my grandparents passed). All of these books are written by Brazilian authors I love and that's my main reason for keeping them, reasoning they would be hard/expensive to find here and I'd like my daughter to read them one day. But will I reread them? Will she ever have the interest in these specific books (she's 8 now)? I've been agonizing over this, and guilt and "what ifs", and the sacredness of books... But now I have your questions to guide me. Thank you so so so so so much, dear Dorena.
I’m glad the questions are helpful. It sounds like the books are very meaningful - and hard to replace. For me, those are two strong arguments for keeping them - unless you literally have no room for them and they are displacing something else that you love even more.
There’s another question that I’ve been sitting with around belongings recently. I’m not sure it applies to your situation, however it just popped into my mind as I was typing you. In case it’s resonates at all for you, the question I’ve been asking recently is…Is this mine to hold?
That's a good question. The problem is how heavy they are to bring over in a suitcase or to send by post, so it's more a financial than a space issue. I sat with the titles, made a list, reduced to 13. I made a bit of research and some I can actually find here on paperback, in Portuguese, to my surprise. Others I can ask someone to hold for me until I visit Brazil again in a few years (my dad has no space). Anyway, this was really helpful. Thank you <3 Also, BURN THOSE DEVILS!!!!
I so LOVE how you processed that decision. Brilliant! So often we make a decision based upon a belief or opinion that we’re sure is correct. But you fact checked yourself and discovered that some could be replaced and some you still want to keep. Well done my friend! 💕💕💕
"Would I want to invite this author into my living room?" That is such an insightful question!
Because the answer for so many books on my shelf is absolutely not, and yet there they sit, taking up space like houseguests who overstayed their welcome years ago. I think we do this thing where we separate the ideas from the person, which sometimes works and sometimes is just a way of avoiding an uncomfortable truth. I kept a book by an author whose later work revealed views I found genuinely harmful, and I told myself it was because the early book was still valuable. But was it? Or was I just attached to who I was when I read it, the version of me who didn't know what I know now? There's grief in that, I think. Not just in the author's fall from grace but in our own evolution past the person who once found them illuminating.
As always….you add such depth to the conversation. One question that I think is legitimate and a necessary part of the conversation is - do I have to surround myself with like minded people and ideas. I think that builds silos - and is there value in having books that show other viewpoints. And yet, these books have energy that may go deeply against our values.
And as you mentioned - do we logic our way into avoiding grief?
So as I write to you, I’m thinking library books are the way to go to avoid all the questions! 😂😂😂
Thank you so much for this helpful list to keep me focused while releasing what is no longer needed or wanted in my space and my life. More and more, I am "in the now" of living with gratitude for my past as I move forward feeling lighter and more joyful.
Thorough, excellent list Dorena. Thank you. I will be adding your questions to my thought process to a short list I apply BEFORE adding a book to my reading stack, or shelf. I would suggest adding an additional item, that being: the book was purchased to support an author. For example, I follow Michael Fanone on Substack - a former police officer injured severely at the Capitol on January 6th, or Maggie Haberman who chronicles our current president for the NYTimes. The former I could not get into, and the later is quite long, and I can only digest/'take' so much of it at one sitting - but they were important to me to support as authors. Those two books will remain on my shelf for a bit more I suspect. . . in the courageous people/people I honor section.
Also, one year when living in a major city, I was able to cart 6 bags of books to a used book buy-back, and left with $125 which was nice. The remaining I droped at a donation place, and at that time, received a receipt for the donation/tax write-off.
That is a good question to add! I had a few of those that I recently let go. They were people I genuinely wanted to support, but not subjects that I was super interested in.
Hi! Love this and I have a question - when you burned the book "cover", did that also include the book? If not, I'm curious what you did with the actual book. Willing to share? I just looked for this book on my shelf, but I must have already decluttered it because it's gone. I recall trying to read it and not getting into it, and (I think) I didn't like the texture of the cover if I am recalling that correctly. So interesting, Dorena, because you brought up so many great points. Truth is, with this particular author, there was a disconnect for me and I love that you named that in your list of discerning questions. So, I'm glad the book is already gone. But still curious to hear how you disposed of the actual book, given the context you shared. Thank you, Dorena!!
Hi! I actually discarded the actual book. My burning cauldron isn’t quite big enough for an entire book - so I decided to burn the book cover as a symbolic release of the entire book - and then let go of the actual book.
Many valid points here Doula - but two I do take umbrage with amidst the many otherwise helpful questions you ask:
1 "Was this book a gift I’m keeping out of loyalty to the giver rather than love of the book?
- Doula I am very happy to remember that a dear friend once wanted to share Thomas Mann's Buddenbrook with me (and thought I was smart enough to get it) - and even wrote on the flyleaf (which so few people seem to do anymore - a kindness for those of us with fading memory ability)
2 "Am I keeping this book for future generations — or is that just an excuse to hold onto memories I’m afraid of losing?"
- As my mind seems to grow foggier with the greying of my hair, I see no problem at all with holding onto memories in a tangible form because sadly yes I AM afraid of losing them.
And yes I have young people in my life who may one day enjoy these and learn from them - Erich Fromm's The Art of Loving; MScott Peck -The Road Less Travelled and many others. There are books that shaped my adulthood and I would love to share them in the future with my niece when she is old enough.
oh and nearly missed no. 3: "Am I keeping this book as physical proof of some aspect of my identity?"
Well - yes! I am in fact one of those people who peers shamelessly at other people's bookshelves to see what sort of interests they have (aka "what sort of people they are") and if they represent my identity (please add to the above mentioned many woo books, chicken raising advice and endless gardening books) I definitely won't be giving them up!
But yes I will be reviewing my bookshelf in light of the many other useful prompts. Thank you!
I appreciate your thoughts and you have made fair points. I do think that the first consideration is space. Too often we are holding onto things for other people or because of other people - and have edged ourself out. We no longer have space for what we love or for our personality to be expressed. It becomes about the others - not about us.
There are also instances where we are keeping something to prove that we were smart or athletic or some other quality. I would put this in the category of “trying too hard.” We’re not keeping the thing because we necessarily resonate with it, but because we want people to think a certain way about us.
This isn’t about getting rid of things that you love. But it is about being conscious about the energy of your belongings and what you decide to keep or let go.
Interesting points Dorena though I do think it is very human to want to "position" ourselves very consciously in order to gain status, approval/love or success - socially and very much so in a career context. Your stance is asking us to move to a higher level of self-awareness...always good in my book (no pun intended)
Love your description of "edging ourselves out" - potent. And apologies for calling you Doula, Dorena, - in my defense it was very very late here! lol
Agreed - it is a super natural response to want to be seen in a particular light to gain approval or status. And yes, I am calling all of us to be more conscious in our spaces. Our home and work spaces are so familiar that often we don't see the patterns we are anchoring. The work I focus on is all about using our homes to bring the subconscious to the conscious, so we can live to our highest potential.
Just the other day I reorganized my office and my books. I found 4 books I decided to let go of.
At first, I thought well, they are books, how can I let them go? But, why keep them around if I'm not going to read them, so I'm donating them. There are a few more I could let go of but I'm not quite ready to part with them yet! LOL 😊
That's awesome! And it's a process :) I find that I circle around my belongings several times - each time having greater clarity on whether I want to keep something or let it go.
Something I find very cool is that when I've cleared out my inner clutter over time and on a consistent basis, I'll wake up one day and I'm at a new level in my energy and without planning it, I feel the need to declutter something that catches my attention. Recently it happened for me with my office without any pre-ideas of doing it. When I uplevel my vibration, I end up decluttering a room, or a drawer etc. 😆✨️
100%!!!! That is the work :) When we uplevel, it's important to uplevel our space to match our new vibration. Otherwise, the old energy in our space drags our vibration back down. And yes...so very often, we do this work intuitively. The curious thing would be to look at what have you cleared internally - and then what were you drawn to clear in your space. Often, there's alignment in those two things.
Hmmm, interesting question Dorena! I felt drawn to re-organize and clear my office. There is still more to do in there but I cleared off my desk and re-arranged some of the furniture - it feels so much “lighter” now and more spacious (like my inner world) ✨ I also de-cluttered one kitchen drawer! LOL. So, I’ll have to think about your quesition a little more as to how it relates to what I’ve cleared energetically from my field…. thank you! 🙏
It's always super fascinating when those two worlds collide - the inner and the outer. I'd be curious if anything you've cleared related to showing up in your work differently. Perhaps being more readily seen.
Thank you so much for this. I'll have to print it and have a LONG moment with this. I currently have around 30 books stored in my father's house in Brazil. He is coming to Europe next month and should bring them to me. He sent me a picture of all of them, to make sure I still want them all. I find it so hard to let go, these 30 books are already the 3rd triage I made of all the books I left when I moved abroad (there were almost 200 + a lot I inherited after my grandparents passed). All of these books are written by Brazilian authors I love and that's my main reason for keeping them, reasoning they would be hard/expensive to find here and I'd like my daughter to read them one day. But will I reread them? Will she ever have the interest in these specific books (she's 8 now)? I've been agonizing over this, and guilt and "what ifs", and the sacredness of books... But now I have your questions to guide me. Thank you so so so so so much, dear Dorena.
I’m glad the questions are helpful. It sounds like the books are very meaningful - and hard to replace. For me, those are two strong arguments for keeping them - unless you literally have no room for them and they are displacing something else that you love even more.
There’s another question that I’ve been sitting with around belongings recently. I’m not sure it applies to your situation, however it just popped into my mind as I was typing you. In case it’s resonates at all for you, the question I’ve been asking recently is…Is this mine to hold?
That's a good question. The problem is how heavy they are to bring over in a suitcase or to send by post, so it's more a financial than a space issue. I sat with the titles, made a list, reduced to 13. I made a bit of research and some I can actually find here on paperback, in Portuguese, to my surprise. Others I can ask someone to hold for me until I visit Brazil again in a few years (my dad has no space). Anyway, this was really helpful. Thank you <3 Also, BURN THOSE DEVILS!!!!
I so LOVE how you processed that decision. Brilliant! So often we make a decision based upon a belief or opinion that we’re sure is correct. But you fact checked yourself and discovered that some could be replaced and some you still want to keep. Well done my friend! 💕💕💕
"Would I want to invite this author into my living room?" That is such an insightful question!
Because the answer for so many books on my shelf is absolutely not, and yet there they sit, taking up space like houseguests who overstayed their welcome years ago. I think we do this thing where we separate the ideas from the person, which sometimes works and sometimes is just a way of avoiding an uncomfortable truth. I kept a book by an author whose later work revealed views I found genuinely harmful, and I told myself it was because the early book was still valuable. But was it? Or was I just attached to who I was when I read it, the version of me who didn't know what I know now? There's grief in that, I think. Not just in the author's fall from grace but in our own evolution past the person who once found them illuminating.
As always….you add such depth to the conversation. One question that I think is legitimate and a necessary part of the conversation is - do I have to surround myself with like minded people and ideas. I think that builds silos - and is there value in having books that show other viewpoints. And yet, these books have energy that may go deeply against our values.
And as you mentioned - do we logic our way into avoiding grief?
So as I write to you, I’m thinking library books are the way to go to avoid all the questions! 😂😂😂
Thank you so much for this helpful list to keep me focused while releasing what is no longer needed or wanted in my space and my life. More and more, I am "in the now" of living with gratitude for my past as I move forward feeling lighter and more joyful.
Love that!!!
I had a Chopra paperback which I decided to put in with the recycling bin( paperbacks are accepted) so that something better is created from it.
Thorough, excellent list Dorena. Thank you. I will be adding your questions to my thought process to a short list I apply BEFORE adding a book to my reading stack, or shelf. I would suggest adding an additional item, that being: the book was purchased to support an author. For example, I follow Michael Fanone on Substack - a former police officer injured severely at the Capitol on January 6th, or Maggie Haberman who chronicles our current president for the NYTimes. The former I could not get into, and the later is quite long, and I can only digest/'take' so much of it at one sitting - but they were important to me to support as authors. Those two books will remain on my shelf for a bit more I suspect. . . in the courageous people/people I honor section.
Also, one year when living in a major city, I was able to cart 6 bags of books to a used book buy-back, and left with $125 which was nice. The remaining I droped at a donation place, and at that time, received a receipt for the donation/tax write-off.
That is a good question to add! I had a few of those that I recently let go. They were people I genuinely wanted to support, but not subjects that I was super interested in.
Hi! Love this and I have a question - when you burned the book "cover", did that also include the book? If not, I'm curious what you did with the actual book. Willing to share? I just looked for this book on my shelf, but I must have already decluttered it because it's gone. I recall trying to read it and not getting into it, and (I think) I didn't like the texture of the cover if I am recalling that correctly. So interesting, Dorena, because you brought up so many great points. Truth is, with this particular author, there was a disconnect for me and I love that you named that in your list of discerning questions. So, I'm glad the book is already gone. But still curious to hear how you disposed of the actual book, given the context you shared. Thank you, Dorena!!
Hi! I actually discarded the actual book. My burning cauldron isn’t quite big enough for an entire book - so I decided to burn the book cover as a symbolic release of the entire book - and then let go of the actual book.
Thank you! xo
I absolutely believe in decluttering books! I too had to double check to see if I had any Deepok Chopra books lol.
I think a lot of us were double checking 🫣
Many valid points here Doula - but two I do take umbrage with amidst the many otherwise helpful questions you ask:
1 "Was this book a gift I’m keeping out of loyalty to the giver rather than love of the book?
- Doula I am very happy to remember that a dear friend once wanted to share Thomas Mann's Buddenbrook with me (and thought I was smart enough to get it) - and even wrote on the flyleaf (which so few people seem to do anymore - a kindness for those of us with fading memory ability)
2 "Am I keeping this book for future generations — or is that just an excuse to hold onto memories I’m afraid of losing?"
- As my mind seems to grow foggier with the greying of my hair, I see no problem at all with holding onto memories in a tangible form because sadly yes I AM afraid of losing them.
And yes I have young people in my life who may one day enjoy these and learn from them - Erich Fromm's The Art of Loving; MScott Peck -The Road Less Travelled and many others. There are books that shaped my adulthood and I would love to share them in the future with my niece when she is old enough.
oh and nearly missed no. 3: "Am I keeping this book as physical proof of some aspect of my identity?"
Well - yes! I am in fact one of those people who peers shamelessly at other people's bookshelves to see what sort of interests they have (aka "what sort of people they are") and if they represent my identity (please add to the above mentioned many woo books, chicken raising advice and endless gardening books) I definitely won't be giving them up!
But yes I will be reviewing my bookshelf in light of the many other useful prompts. Thank you!
I appreciate your thoughts and you have made fair points. I do think that the first consideration is space. Too often we are holding onto things for other people or because of other people - and have edged ourself out. We no longer have space for what we love or for our personality to be expressed. It becomes about the others - not about us.
There are also instances where we are keeping something to prove that we were smart or athletic or some other quality. I would put this in the category of “trying too hard.” We’re not keeping the thing because we necessarily resonate with it, but because we want people to think a certain way about us.
This isn’t about getting rid of things that you love. But it is about being conscious about the energy of your belongings and what you decide to keep or let go.
Interesting points Dorena though I do think it is very human to want to "position" ourselves very consciously in order to gain status, approval/love or success - socially and very much so in a career context. Your stance is asking us to move to a higher level of self-awareness...always good in my book (no pun intended)
Love your description of "edging ourselves out" - potent. And apologies for calling you Doula, Dorena, - in my defense it was very very late here! lol
Agreed - it is a super natural response to want to be seen in a particular light to gain approval or status. And yes, I am calling all of us to be more conscious in our spaces. Our home and work spaces are so familiar that often we don't see the patterns we are anchoring. The work I focus on is all about using our homes to bring the subconscious to the conscious, so we can live to our highest potential.